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The party lover’s guide to throwing a party

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Housemates and house parties. Best combination since Jack and coke? Gin and tonic? Jay and Beyonce?

Of course it is. Everyone knows that! Though you might be throwing the best party that will be the talk of Facebook for the next month, you don’t need the hangover of upsetting the po-po…or the landlords. Or other housemates, because yanno, you gotta live with them. So here’s a guide to throwing the best party minus the “oh shit!” moments.

  1. Check your lease agreement

You read everything you sign, right? Especially iPhone software update licences – all 90 pages! Before you host an intergalactic kegger you should check if your lease agreement explicitly prohibits mass gatherings (especially in flats) or disturbing the peace – which could get you officially warned or thrown out. Of course, this messes up any future chance of leasing, which is…not good.

  1. Tell the neighbours

If you don’t want the 5-0 showing up at your door, its common courtesy to tell your neighbours to expect a bit more noise than usual. That way, you’re on good terms with them from the start, and they can approach you first before getting the fuzz involved. Who knows, they might be rad and rock up for a shoey! (They probably won’t.)

  1. Don’t fight for your right to party – know your rights

In many jurisdictions throughout Australia, noise approaching or exceeding “nuisance” levels must lawfully be turned down. In Victoria, The Environment Protection (Residential Noise) Regulations Act 2008 states this in clear detail. It prohibits the playing of excessively loud music at the following times:

  • Monday to Thursday: before 7am and after 10pm.
  • Friday: before 7am and after 11pm.
  • Saturday and public holidays: before 9am and after 11pm.
  • Sunday: before 9am and after 10pm.

Of course, what constitutes a “nuisance” is subjective. I mean, your metalhead neighbours may object to ear-ripping George Michael marathons, for example…

  1. Information lockdown

More often than not, we hear about house parties that “went viral” on social media, causing hordes of people to crash and cause mayhem. This type of mayhem you do not want, nor need in your life. To avoid being the next Corey Worthington (remember him?) keep your house party plans to a trusted few, and put a cap on +1s. Make this boundary clear from the outset, to avoid any last minute “hey is it alright if X comes?” texts.

  1. Contents insurance

If you break it, you bought it is the mantra of the shopkeeper, but its way harder to enforce on your mates. If you leave sentimental and high value items about the house, it’s best to put them out of sight. Even though Spotify accounts stop people from stealing LPs and CDs we no longer own, that dodgy-looking mate of a mate who swore up and down he was a top bloke might avail himself of some pre-owned merchandise…if you aren’t careful.

What are some of your tips for throwing a party without the shit bits?

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